"I smell like an antique store farted on a bag of pot."

~g.l.~ (about his shirt)

"You're not understanding my boobs!"

~a.p. to l.c.~

"Stop smelling my sriracha!"

~j.k.~

"My rabbit ate my passport..."

~a.p.~

"I drink extra."

~a.p.~

"Santa Claus, he looks just like Santa Claus or Kenny Rogers."
-Araka-

"The moral decay of America began with self-serve gas stations."
-Jim-

"You're not always wrong, just when you're not in my bed."
-lb-

"I love gangrene, because I'm like 'Ooh! Ooh! I know what comes next!'"
-bh-

"I thought there was just that one kind of love."
-tg-

"China is work."
-tg-

"South America has Spanish."
-tg-

Slick, like Tiffany slick."
-tg-

Soon to come - 875 reasons why Tiffany & Luoi broke up. (I'm not bitter.)

"No, any Jack will do."
-bc-

"And that's why cats don't eat salad." -LG-

"I'm more popular when I drink." -TG-

"Being a white girl in Oakland makes you want some culture bad." -FG-

There's nothing else to do but go here or go somewhere else
-Random boy in the Kerry House

Square meat is my favorite flavor!
-Christi

I hate it when I get the plague
-Tiffany

It's not beastiality in it if the cat initiates it...
-Sarah

See! Pigs could donate blood to each other!
-Celeste